Delightful stories

One of my favorite sounds in the world these days is the sound of Meng Pu's laugh. It is so full of love and joy and life, it comes from the Lord, and it is contagious.

Our study on faith continues. He reads it in Zo language, and I follow along in English. Sometimes as he reads, he will pause and close his eyes and say, "Yes, hallelujah... it is good..." These are the moments I know he is reading something very familiar and dear to him, something that has comforted or strengthened him in the past.

Sometimes as he reads, he will stop mid-sentence and gasp and put his hand over his heart, and read it again and say, "Oh! God is... I need... dis is very good." These are the moments I know that God is teaching him a new thing, challenging him in his heart.

But then there are sometimes, more often in the recent weeks, when he is reading and does a double-take. He reads in a calm voice, then says, "eh?" and looks at me, then looks back at the verse, points to it, and translates it into English, to see if my Bible says the same thing his does. When I nod and confirm it, his face breaks into a huge smile and he chuckles, then laughs out loud, so hard that he has to take his reading glasses off and wipe his eyes. I can't help but laugh along with him. And these are the moments I know he just discovered something new about the character of God, and he takes such delight in it.

Some things that have brought him laughter lately: Rahab was a prostitute from Jericho, and God chose to rescue her and put her in the family of King David. Gideon had too many men, and God kept sending them home. Barak wouldn't go to war without Deborah, so God gave the honor of killing Sisera to a woman. Samson's parents wanted him to marry a nice Israelite girl from a good family, but God wanted him to marry a Philistine and stir up all sorts of trouble. In Meng Pu's words: "Bad woman, bad city, bad thing. But God say it is good, God say I will love, God say I want. We want no same God want. I need obey God say."

What stories in the Bible delight you? Which ones show you crazy and beautiful things about who God is? Which ones make you laugh until you cry with the joy of the Lord?

A general message

I haven't written in a while. Sometimes that means there is nothing to say, nothing worth writing down. But lately there has just been too much. Every day for the past month has been packed - truth, beauty, love, power, joy, hope, pain, comfort, peace, faith... little moments in God's Word, with a friend in the car, with my roommates late at night, with my neighbors in the kitchen, listening to music, watching movies, reading books aloud, writing poetry, eating food, singing loudly, speaking softly, laughing until we cry... There's been no fluff, no wasted space - even rest has been intentional. It hasn't been busy-ness, it's just been fullness, and it's overwhelming. There was a wedding I got to be a part of, and a tiny new baby I got to hold, a visiting pastor from Burma I got to pray with, and a college group I got to train; and so many conversations, so rich and powerful.

I realized this week that it has been a year since I was in the hospital. And I realized today that it has been a year since that beautiful Easter morning of hope that I wrote about. I opened an old journal that I haven't used in a while, and the first page was my thoughts in the hospital about the day I thought I would die - I wanted to die. They are dark thoughts, thoughts of fear and anger and hopelessness. It alarmed me to re-read such things in my own handwriting, but I am so thankful for it, because it reminds me of where I was and how much God has healed me since then. I am so grateful that he has given me a whole year in his mercy, and he has swept me away in his grace. 

I'm making a list of all the posts I need to catch up on, so you can enjoy some of the details too. But this broader, more general message is to let you know that by God's grace I am still here - still breathing, still living, still smiling, still hanging on to hope - and He is still doing marvelous things in this little "bowl of cherries."

The point.

"When before His throne I stand in Him complete,
'Jesus died, my soul to save!' my lips shall still repeat..."

I often wonder what it will be like to stand before the throne of God... I haven't stood on my two feet since I was ten years old, and as good as my imagination is, I have forgotten what it feels like. Add to that the wonder of being made complete - not lacking in anything, having no trace of weakness or impurity in my body, heart, or mind... to really stand as never before. Add to that, this will be in the presence of my God, in his throne room, before his throne... when I try to consider the magnitude of that, I can't believe that I will be able to stand at all... that I'll fall flat on my face, crumpled into a twisted heap that can't bear the light of his glory and holiness.

I think about that day a lot, about the strength and wholeness of my body, the freedom from emotional messes, the unity of relationship with God and other believers, the bliss of unrestricted adventure, the joy of life to the fullest. But I love that the song says that the praise on my lips will be "Jesus died, my soul to save." That will be the everlasting truth, the key, the foundation, the point. Sometimes I brush it aside as a well-known fact and a well-worn page: "Jesus died to save me... John 3:16... yeah, I know, I got it already..." But the truth is, it is the only thing that matters. If Jesus didn't die, and if he didn't have the power to save me from sin and death, then there would be no hope - no hope of physical wholeness, or emotional freedom, or relational peace, or wonder about standing in the presence of the King of kings, or restoration of life as it was intended to be. These are all affects, results, made possible because of his sacrifice. And so it will be my anthem throughout eternity, and it will never get old.

"But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on him, and by his wounds we are healed. We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to our own way; and the Lord has laid on him the iniquity of us all." - Isaiah 53:5-6

"The blood of goats and bulls and the ashes of a heifer sprinkled on those who are ceremonially unclean sanctify them so that they are outwardly clean. How much more, then, will the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offered himself unblemished to God, cleanse our consciences from acts that lead to death, so that we may serve the living God! For this reason Christ is the mediator of a new covenant, that those who are called may receive the promised eternal inheritance—now that he has died as a ransom to set them free from the sins committed under the first covenant... In fact, the law requires that nearly everything be cleansed with blood, and without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness." - Hebrews 13-15, 22

"Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death. For what the law was powerless to do because it was weakened by the flesh, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh to be a sin offering." - Romans 8:1-3