Praise-Strength

I began this morning singing praise songs to the Lord, and I'm amazed at what a difference it has made in me today! I feel more joyful, more full of hope than I have in a while. 

I realized I'd been starting my days with sighs and prayers for mere survival: "Somehow just help me through today," my heart moaned and whined. While it was an honest sentiment, it was pathetic. I have not felt like a victorious conqueror in Christ, and I haven't really been trying to feel like it either. My focus has been so much on myself and my problems, even when I'm talking with God, and I wonder how he hasn't lost his patience with me yet.

So this morning, he made a good suggestion: "Why not focus on Me for a while? Not on your complaints and doubts and worries, but just on Me." So I did. I sang some of my favorite praise songs for a while, and I felt lighter and freer and stronger as I praised.

It wasn't until after I did this that I read Psalm 8, and this verse stood out to me:

From the lips of children and infants
you have ordained praise
because of your enemies,
to silence the foe and the avenger.

- Psalm 8:2 (NIV)

Something I had never noticed before, was that the word "praise" had a note by it that just said "strength." Usually that means it is a synonym, but I'd never connected those two words before. So I checked a couple others versions/translations of the verse:

Out of the mouth of babes and nursing infants
You have ordained strength,
Because of Your enemies,
That You may silence the enemy and the avenger. (NKJV)

You have taught children and infants
to tell of your strength,
silencing your enemies
and all who oppose you. (NLT)

Then I found this commentary:

The word "strength" is rendered by the Septuagint as "praise" - αἷνον ainon - and this is followed in the quotation in Matthew 21:16. The same rendering is adopted in the Latin Vulgate and in the Syriac. The Hebrew word - עז ‛ôz - properly means strength, might; and the idea here would seem to be, that even from babes and sucklings - from those who were in themselves so feeble - God had taken occasion to accomplish a work requiring great power - to wit, in "stilling the enemy and the avenger;" that is, he had made those who were so feeble the instruments of accomplishing so great a work. (Barne's Notes)

As I learned this morning, when we choose to praise God in our weakness, we experience his strength at work in our hearts and lives.... And when we allow God to demonstrate his strength through our weakness, our lives bring praise to Him.

Stretching

After my hospital stay, when I was recovering, my doctor prescribed some physical therapy for me. Mind you, physical therapy was a big part of my life . . . twenty years ago. I remember doing exciting and strenuous exercises like sitting up and balancing on a giant rubber ball and blowing cotton balls around a tabletop with a straw. But most of all I remember the stretches: stretching knees, ankles, and hips, mostly, and the amazing goniometer that would measure how far I could extend these joints. The PT would stretch my leg out as far as possible before I would wince or whine, and then just hold it there for a minute until the muscles behind my knees loosened up. I hated physical therapy. What would it look like now?

I had a really positive PT experience this month, and I learned some things that have helped me understand how muscles and neurons in my weak and messed up body works. Today, I was sitting in Kevan's room, going through my exercise routine, which is more just a stretching routine... which I realized is actually more of a "holding pattern" routine. This is how it works: I stretch my neck to one side and hold it for thirty seconds, then stretch to the other side and hold for thirty seconds, then repeat several more times. Then I wrap a big rubber band around something solid and pull it back toward me, and hold for a few seconds. Then I wrap it around the back of my neck and pull it down toward my lap, and... hold...

Notice a pattern? Well I did. A lot of holding... tension in waiting. This is apparently how muscles are built, strength is built. And this week in my spiritual life I feel it is true too. I've felt some tension as I wait on the Lord to see what he will do. Hanging on, keeping a grip on things, and waiting can be difficult, even painful, and it is. But as I pull and stretch and hang out in uncomfortable positions and circumstances, I'm wondering what is happening to the muscles of my soul and spirit in the mean time. Are they building up and getting stronger? The more I stretch and work out my faith, and the more I maintain my focus on what is true in the midst of trials, the more I feel the ache in places that haven't been challenged in a while, muscles that I've taken for granted and not really tested lately. But also, the more I learn and grow, and the more I feel like God is strengthening and preparing me for the next step in my journey with him, whatever that is.

Once again, God is using my weakness to make me more aware of his presence and more dependent on his strength.

It's personal to me

Have you ever read the Bible, or a devotional entry, or a Bible study, or heard a sermon, or a testimony, or a song, that felt like it was directly written for you? It's as though the author or speaker had a special insight into the private details of your current life situation and the feelings you are having about it in the deepest corners of your soul, and nailed the bulls-eye on what you needed to hear.

I have this book called Jesus Calling, by Sarah Young... and I'm not normally a "5-minute daily devotional thought" kind of girl, but I have gotten in the habit of reading the daily words of this book during my morning nebulizer routine. And it seems like every day has a truth, promise, or challenge that I need for that specific day... sometimes I don't realize it until later in the day, and sometimes I think, How did she know I woke up with that thought or attitude?

Mom and I have been going through the video series of Beth Moore's Esther Bible study whenever I'm at home, and it seems like every video knocks the wind out of me, leaving me breathless and wondering, How could she have said the very truth I have so recently forgotten to apply to my life?

In my personal quiet time, I've been studying the book of Mark and meditating on 1 John. And as I journal and process what I am learning, I am amazed: How can the words written 2,000 years ago be so relevant and speak so directly to my heart?

I think it's because God is the true Author behind all of this, inspiring people to write down, speak, or sing his truth that doesn't change. His word is living and active and sharper than a sword. It penetrates and divides our soul and spirit, and judges our thoughts and heart attitudes (Hebrews 4:12). When I ask the Holy Spirit to teach and counsel me, when I open myself up to his discipline and challenges, when I long to remember his truth and promises... he does! He makes printed words come alive in my heart; he makes ancient stories relevant to my situation; he makes letters written to early churches and books that have sold a million copies personal to me. And it's because he is an alive, relevant, and personal God. He knows my heart and my thoughts, and he does have incredible insights into the private details of my current life situation, and he knows the things I will face throughout the day before I do. And he desires - longs - to be known by me, too.

I am so thankful that his promise is true: ask, and you will receive; seek, and you will find; knock, and the door will be opened.